Small World. Big Wonders.

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–>

let me
define it…

and bring all
assumptions to an end…

     it is nothing…

     it was
nothing…
          nothing but a volatile sentiment …
          unfounded, unconfirmed…

          evanescent,
fleeting…

watched a movie last night and one of the characters’ dialogue got me..not sure if these were the exact words but more or less, the idea is there. just thought of sharing it with you..

"just when i was about to leave, you start doing something..
and that’s when i see the tiniest glimpse of the kid in you..
that’s why i decided to stay for five more minutes..
to see the next five minutes of it.."

..what might have been..

has already been..

can one isolate love from pain?..

          if yes, how?..

                    if no, why?..

"At times, it helps to be around horrid beings not ‘coz it awakens your dark self to be able to put up with them..

but it gives you a sense of feeling that you’re nothing in the least like them."

I grew up in a time when this country was at the crossroads of economic and political reform, when we had to undergo a period of immense environmental transformation and economic restoration. Though there was so much going on, I did not miss out on one thing—living life’s true pleasures.

As a child, I was fearless. I got into accidents more often than other kids my own age: I’ve been into a vehicular disaster, a bike blunder, a swing misfortune, I almost got drowned several times, fell from a tree leaving a lasting reminder of my stupidity, a scar on my face. I have two elder brothers so I had no choice but to get physical with them in sports, of course, along with their other playmates. We’d do cartwheels, hit the ground, and wouldn’t care about the pain. As a growing youngster, I also caught myself up into petty squabbles with another kid who was mocking my brother. I put dirt on the strawberry jelly ace that I gave him and told him they were chocolate toppings. Guess I wasn’t so nice after all! I enjoyed playing outdoors and it was only when my younger sister grew a little older that I began playing girly stuff and had girl friends over to the house to play with and munch some snacks.

You know that point when parents wanted you to possibly learn everything that they would expose you to almost all there is to know? I meant that in a good sense. Our house almost turned into a pet shop once when we had dogs, cats, rabbits, hamsters, pigeons, love birds, and fish as pets. I just love to have pets around. I remember my parents taking us to the beach. They’d teach us how to jump over waves, do some water moves and make sand castles. We went on picnics by the river and went fishing. Going camping, outdoor cooking on bonfire night, stargazing and ghost hunting with my cousins were some of my favorites.

When primary school started to matter, I became serious with academics but keeping in mind my extracurriculars. I was literally a member of all the clubs that existed in school and never did I miss a school function. I was one of those I call “the busy youth school population.” When I reached high school, I decided to give up on one thing I’ve been doing since I was four- joining declamation contests. I just can’t take the pressure anymore and it was lonely performing alone. I chose to pursue my love of dancing. It inspired me more when we placed third in a cheering competition notwithstanding all the bruises on my knees and the killer muscle pain. It was all worth it and lesson learned, use knee pads during practice. At this point in time did I start to have countless number of crushes and go gaga over ‘em and each guy has an interesting story. Young love. College life was a bit complicated but I was more in control. This was a phase in my life when people who just can’t get over high school annoyed me so much but led me to finding good friends and my best friend. I took post graduate studies and God has been good to me even more blessing me with a bunch of lovely people.

I will hold on to these memories for as long as a live coz certainly no amount of money can ever buy any amount of happiness that is worthwhile in this life. I know sometimes life could be rude but all it takes is to have a bright perspective to be able to find your own slice of heaven in this world.

\m/^_^ \m/

I woke up this morning finding myself composing a short poem on insomnia. I had to get out of bed and write it down at once while my spontaneous creative impulses are up and on.

“INSOMNIA”

Thessa Mae I. Curamen

Restless in the still of night

Tossing and turning between sheets

Eyes closed yet so wide awake

As random thoughts play in my head

Darkness is my blanket

And soft is my pillow

Time ticks away

And suddenly it’s tomorrow

It’s disappointing how the use of the word “friend” became superficial with time. Webster’s dictionary defines it as a person whom one knows and is fond of, and that’s about it. But little did we know that friendship has three levels. First, the pragmatic friendship wherein people found a relationship based on a need without forming a bond. Once the need is fulfilled, the friendship ends. The second is the empathetic friendship in which two persons establish a bond based on trust and confidence. They care and feel for each other and make life easy to live with. The connection is strong, therefore the relationship lasts. The third and the ultimate type of relationship is the value friendship where two friends are in union with each other’s principles and standards but do not lose their identity in the process. There is a certain profundity in the relationship that friendship is way past their individual interests. And that brings us to my own definition of what a friend is.

A T-R-U-E friend:

..has the right to agree or disagree with me.  Should he/she disagree; it doesn’t follow that he/she can disapprove. (In short, SUPPORT & RESPECT.)

..is entitled to his/her own opinion but it doesn’t mean that he/she can criticize me. (Save them until asked)

..is someone I can have an argument with and work things out like nothing happened.

..celebrates my triumphs and consoles me in times of grief.

..doesn’t exacerbate an explosive situation.

..doesn’t take sides (that is so high school) but instead bridge the gap.

..is someone I haven’t seen, say, for years but I’m perfectly comfortable with. (Like nothing changed)

..makes me understand, not mislead me.

..can tell what’s wrong with me without making it sound like a sermon. (Two parents are enough.)

..sticks around not only during good times but for all seasons. (I’m so fed up with “fair-weather-friends”)

..is far beyond ideal but remains real.

I am quoting Vince’s prof when he said that men are sensitive beings but sometimes can be quite insensitive. I strongly agree. I certainly am at times but at least it dawns on me. Talk about the most insensitive person I know on a “sometimes” basis? When she reads this, she’ll know coz these are the same things I tell her but don’t seem to get through her… so sick of the thought that that my words fall upon deaf ears.

She’s good when she’s good. She has this tendency to drift away from real life into a little wonderland of her own (at least she’s not doing any drugs). She would say yes to you now and tomorrow she wouldn’t even care. You ask a question, what do you get? A sloppy answer, worst, not a single word. She would ask questions with “plain-as-the-nose-on-your-face” answers (ask someone else, not me). She’s like a typhoon, hurricane, cyclone, tornado, tsunami, name it. She wastes time on superfluous matters and dashes things off (fine with me, just don’t bug me). “Everything at her convenience” (Trust me, learned it the hard way. ~wink~). So irresponsible (ain’t cool)! Can’t you for once grow up?!

I really love this girl, but sometimes can’t help but hate her.

Warning: Take it constructively, it’ll help. Take it differently, suffer defeat!

Just turned 23 and I want you guys to know how happy I was upon receiving your greetings. I was a bit surprised as well to hear from unexpected people, you know who you are. And with this, I’d like to express my sincerest gratitude to the following people who remembered to drop by, leave a message, make a phone call or send a text message: Daddy, Mommy, Valerie, Sam, Ate Janet, Tito Jun, Tita Vangie, Cherry Anne, Rikki Von, Rein, Misu, Ate Gail, Dra. Econ, Tita Alou, Geng, France, Shishi, Carol, Kittin, Set, Bechay, Mods, Rolly, Marianne, Kuya IP, Otep, Jerry, Pons, Micah, Ate Jacquie, Alton…  To Shane, although I didn’t get your phone call, I appreciate the thought that you wanted to greet me. To Tabs, can’t thank you enough for the big surprise, loved it! Thank you everyone!